Tonight we celebrated my birthday. Yesterday was my actual birthday (September 11th - perhaps there will be more on that another time). Had a potluck dinner at home. It was awesome. Justnow, though, as I was tucking my oldest (almost 5), I realized what an awesome gift my children are. I remember thinking "by the time I'm 30, I want to have started to have children." Amelia was born a month after my 30th birthday. And she has been the most amazing gift. Such a joy - all she really wants is to be with us. I'm reminded of the scene in Lost in Translation...
Bob: The most terrifying day of your life is the day the first one is born.
Charlotte: Nobody ever tells you that.
Bob: Your life, as you know it... is gone. Never to return. But they learn how to walk, and they learn how to talk... and you want to be with them. And they turn out to be the most delightful people you will ever meet in your life.
I can't say I agree with the "terrifying" part, but the rest is true. Absolutely true.
Happy birthday, Me.
Saturday, September 12, 2009
Monday, September 7, 2009
It's hard being a stay-at-home mom
This weekend we went on vacation. A labor day family-camp type vacation. Which means I spent 48 straight hours following an almost 2 year old toddler around. This is not a vacation. This is everyday life in another location. This is actually worse than everyday life, since when we're at home I can at least know what she's probably up to if she's not in the same room with me.
What a bitch. This is the stage of my life when vacation is not a relaxing break from the norm.
It's exhausting. And let me say I can't stand when people over-use that word. But that's exactly what it is.
And you know the best part? We get to do it all over again over Thanksgiving. That's right! Thanksgiving! I'm already grateful for the end of that trip.
But on the other hand, I feel awful. I feel awful because when I'm constantly keeping tabs on the toddler, the almost-5-year-old gets no mommy time. That is, if she even wants mommy time. And then when she does, it's because I'm snapping at her for not wanting to eat the dessert I just got her off the buffet. Fuck.
How do moms like me get a break? Everyone else is at work! Should I get a job just so I can have consistent adult time? Is that the answer?
What a bitch. This is the stage of my life when vacation is not a relaxing break from the norm.
It's exhausting. And let me say I can't stand when people over-use that word. But that's exactly what it is.
And you know the best part? We get to do it all over again over Thanksgiving. That's right! Thanksgiving! I'm already grateful for the end of that trip.
But on the other hand, I feel awful. I feel awful because when I'm constantly keeping tabs on the toddler, the almost-5-year-old gets no mommy time. That is, if she even wants mommy time. And then when she does, it's because I'm snapping at her for not wanting to eat the dessert I just got her off the buffet. Fuck.
How do moms like me get a break? Everyone else is at work! Should I get a job just so I can have consistent adult time? Is that the answer?
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)